Creating Your Comfort Zone

by Catherine Greenleaf

One way to help yourself through the grief process is to give yourself the gift of a "comfort zone." This is a corner of your house or apartment where you feel safe and comfortable. It is an area where you know that when you close the door, you have privacy and quiet.

1) Figure out where your safe corner is. Put your favorite comfy chair in this corner, preferably by a window so you can enjoy the antics of the birds outside and feel the breeze through the screen window during the warmer months.

2) Surround your favorite chair with treasured mementos -- photos of pleasurable trips, colorful pillows, crystals, and lush, green plants. You can even put a comfy crocheted afghan nearby to cover your legs when you're chilly.

3) Things to avoid. You'll want to avoid the TV, telephone, radio and computer during this time. All of these serve to distract you with busy work, interrupt you with other people's concerns, or upset you with violent news. 


4) Spend at least 15 minutes each morning in your comfort zone. Even this small amount of time can carry you psychologically through the entire day. Make yourself a hot mug of cocoa or a cup of green tea. Invite your pet dog or cat to come sit with you while you relax.

5) Put on some music. Classical music is often soothing. So is New Age music. Experiment with different composers and sounds until you find the music that brings you serenity.

6) Create a ritual during your 15 minutes. Sip on your tea. Read your favorite positive affirmation lists or spiritual books. Start a journal. Write down all your deepest thoughts. Write a gratitude list.

Make this "comfort zone" a place you can come to any time you are feeling overwhelmed and in need of a time-out to think. If you can create this zone and use it regularly you will boost your self-esteem, because you will be doing something nourishing for you -- for your peace of mind and for the fulfillment of your soul. You will gain clarity around your challenges and the answers will come easier and faster. This will be your opportunity to listen to, and develop trust in, that still small voice inside of you -- the voice that will always tell you the truth -- no matter what is going on.


You are worth taking care of! You deserve to heal!